Guest blogger here

Hello everyone this is V’s wife. I thought i would join the party to help give ideas to V.

Well there is the cat – not the outside cat but the black cat. The outside cat has come back just so you know, Food seems to be a good way to forgive and forget…seems like some people I know. Anywho, inside cat is high strung if V hasn’t mentioned that in the past. She jumps at anything new. Not jump at it but jump from it…straight up in the air usually or the cat slink. Either one quite fun to watch

Then there is me…always working or making V join some other crazy new hobby. Ikebana is the newest and V is fantastic at it. She wouldn’t tell you that but she is. I may sign us up for blacksmithing…could be fun, I like fire. Well not in the kitchen where most of my fires seem to happen when I try and cook. Good thing I learned to put out ceramic fires when I did sculpture so it comes in handy — have a lot of salt around….just saying.

I work a lot so does V. My time is often at home prepping for class. I teach a lot of classes from science to art so I’m constantly refining. V gets to be home some Friday which makes the weekend nice and long. When we are in the same room its kinda like a project is being done. Now I’m not the best office mate…I make a lot of noise and often it startles V and the cat…both jump up…makes me laugh but doesn’t help sharing an office ’cause I get the hairy eyeball from both of them.

We we had a great weekend…we were in LA hanging with all the in crowds…class, museum, dinner and concert. Today just hanging. Anywho I better give up the reins and let V finish her blogs. Thanks for letting me play.

Catch Up

For those of you who know Kim, she is working for Carnival Cruise Line in Florida.
Hanging out with her new nephew, camping at the beach and doing well.

Guest Blog

Wake.
Oh when will I ever get rid of this ridiculous virus?
Okay, perk up and wear something nice. That’ll make me feel better. Wear something to match the new maroon shoes!
Eat, shower, thank God I moved my haircut up to this Saturday.
Late! Listen to VP all hands on the blackberry.
Put Sophie out to pee.
Dress, putting on fabulous new shoes. Ooh, they feel tight.
Collect myself. Boy this all-hands call is boring. Blah, blah, blah that’s why you laid a bunch of people off. Right.
Ooh these shoes feel really tight.
Let Sophie back in.
Dang what is UP with these shoes?
A Narrow? I bought 8 1/2 narrow? How did I do that? I can’t wear these.
Quick, find other shoes to go with outfit.
Impossible. Can’t wear the peep toes. All I’ve got to cover my ankles with is cheap nude knee-hi nylons.
Try the old red shoes. No. The black ones. No. These old boots. Are you kidding?
Crap.
Peep toes with the nylons. I’ll hide my feet under my desk all day.
Blackberry is dying. Oh well, they’re in the Q&A portion anyway. Hang up.
(Sophie) WHATAREYOUDOING??? You let me in but you haven’t left yet. Where’s my greenie? I think I’ll stand here and shake.
Grab stuff, coat, greenie and do the goodbye ritual with the neurotic dog.
Finally in car on the way to work.
(Car) BEEEEEP! Tire pressure is low.
Fuck. <sigh>
Pull over. Tires all look the same. Wait until after work? When it’s dark? Take the risk? Drive on the viaduct with low tire pressure….in which tire and why? With dying phone?
Nope.
Stop at Chevron. Put air in all four tires, wearing my nice clothes, squatting over puddles of gas and oil.
Traffic-wind blows my hair back to bedhead.
Late for my meeting.
You’d think it’s Monday.
(Fred–looking at my shoes) Oooh, shiny. I like the way they go from black to grey.
Hmm.

Guest Blog

Guys: How to Ensure You Stay Single

  1. Court a woman online and ask her to dinner.
  2. During the date, express absolutely no interest in her except as a sounding board for three hours of your musings on your ex-wife, child, and the dissolution of your marriage. Do not ask the woman anything about herself.
  3. Ignore all subtle and not-so-subtle cues that the woman has had enough and would like to conclude the date.
  4. Awkwardly try to add up what you owe and she owes on the bill. When she graciously saves your sorry ass by suggesting you split it 50/50, agree even though your share was about $15 more.
  5. Suggest you both go out again, and then leave her standing on the street in the dark by herself. Do not walk her to her car.
  6. Send the woman an email sharing the details of your last few days caring for a sick child. Describe the child’s symptoms, including diarrhea.
  7. Conclude the email by saying how much you enjoyed meeting the woman and learning more about her, and tell her you’ve met someone else you want to pursue.

By:  Haddie Nufoflosers

Guest Blog

If I had a blog….

I would write 10,000 words today about how there is a limit to how many personal idiosyncracies we should have to put up with in the office. There’s a dude here who has more hair than Cousin It and who walks around in shorts and tube socks, even INTO THE BATHROOM. Every time I see him I gag a little.
But that would be right afer the blog about this:
Saturday: previously scheduled accup / massage appts at 9:40 and 11:15.
Rehearsal from 11-2 on the Saturday schedule two weeks ago
I note conflict, saying I can’t make it til 1:00
I’m asked to reschedule my appts.
I turn myself and my two practitioners into pretzels to get accu rescheduled for this afternoon at 5:00, causing me to leave work early, and massage on Sat at 3:45.
I notify SM I’ve resolved the conflict
SM forgets
SM produces new schedule showing my conflict so no rehearsal for our show (just for the other two episodes)
I remind SM that I resolved the conflict
SM changes the schedule so that all three shows are rehearsing–MINE IS CALLED AT 1:00
Now tell me, WTF did I do all the rescheduling for? Now I have rehearsal from 1-2, and a massage at 3:45. There goes the whole f’ing day.
No wonder I’m a crabby bitch today.
That’s what I’d blog about. You can post that if you want.